Every man and woman online still has criteria that must be met by people who want to date him or her, and every guy and girl is still in direct competition with every other person of their gender…
Whereas before a man just needed to be the best looking guy at work to get a date with a colleague, now he needed to be in the top 10% of all men to get a date with one of the women in his city.” This is the double-edged sword of online dating.
I’ll call you tomorrow,” she said at the end of the best first date ever. You’ve been “ghosted.” The term is used most often to describe a sudden end to a potential romance, though it keeps expanding in our lexicon. Of course, there’s nothing exactly novel about cutting off contact with someone.
No one is forced to tell anyone that they’re going to be real busy at work or that they’re moving to Yemen. “You see a guy isn’t worth your time faster this way, and it’s preferable because you don’t have much time to waste anyway.” What’s next?
Well, New York Magazine declared something called “benching” to be the “new” ghosting while Cosmopolitan went with a similar-sounding “breadcrumbing” as ghosting’s up-and-coming replacement. It’s supposed to be a fun thing that you do while you look for someone to settle down with, not something you struggle through under duress.
However, it’s always good to back up hypotheses with facts, and that’s what Jon Millward did with this experiment, posted on his eponymous blog.
“The expanded horizons offered by online dating don’t equal unrestricted access to a ready and waiting list of beautiful people.