Understandably, non-Danes find it difficult to develop friendships with their Danish colleagues, who often appear uncomfortable spending more than a couple minutes at a time on chit chat. In fact, we may even want to get to know you better – just not during working hours.Many a time did I walk past a line of people in London and nod with approval; Brits are one of the few peoples in the world whom we consider fellow masters at queuing.In an effort to impress us, he proceeded to demonstrate that Swedes were terrified of confrontation by yelling “SWEDES ARE TERRIFIED OF CONFRONTATION JUST WATCH THEY WON’T SAY ANYTHING TO ME” at the top of his lungs. Apparently, one-night-stands are the first step to relationships, and you don’t even have to flirt or talk much beforehand – they like to skip the awkward part and just go home together at the end of the night! I almost had a heart attack, expecting a fight to break out on the spot, but was even more shocked to discover that our new Swedish friends had slipped through thin air and disappeared. I do hear that Swedes are excellent family material, especially if you’re all about splitting household responsibilities and taking turns changing diapers and all that other progressive stuff that us Russkis will probably never evolve to. Ever since moving to Europe three years ago, and particularly since launching this male-objectifying exercise of a blog, I have been repeatedly advised – no, instructed – to go to Scandinavia.
A lot of things that a typical Dane tries to joke about also happen to be things that probably shouldn't be joked about. And no, we don't wear helmets either; it's so uncool, and more importantly it messes up our hair.The situation only got better throughout the day, hitting its peak at the the Copenhagen Street Market, where I could no longer control myself and actually whipped out my camera to capture (and Instagram) all the homogenous hotness (and my Honeymoon Wife threatened to disown me.) Although we were warned that Danish men can be quite stand-offish and reserved, expecting women to take the initiative (these are the people responsible for the who “going Dutch” injustice, after all), we were pleasantly surprised to be approached throughout the entire night – or at least starting 1am, when most people had enough drinks in their system. An unfulfilled fantasy of tall hunks and impeccable street style, both of which never quite measured up to our expectations.Even though everybody did seem to be massively inebriated, the pickup scene fun and non-sleazy, not to mention refreshingly easy due to the Danes’ mastery of the English language. The people are hot, fun, and inexplicably happy to be alive, which is pretty refreshing and a bit surprising, considering the arctic temperatures 9 months of the year. Maybe we looked in the wrong places, but judging by the size of the city and the blisters on my Converse-clad feed, not a neighborhood was left unexplored.Back in university, I was chatting with a Swedish friend over drinks about where we could spend our internship semester.She mentioned that it could be interesting to do an internship at a UN agency in North Korea. “I want to ride my bicycle; I want to ride it where I like.” Freddie Mercury agreed with us - bicycling is awesome.